By Julie Adamen

Christmas starts early nowadays. Before Thanksgiving I began seeing the telltale signs:  Artificial trees and wrapping paper at Costco, Norelco shaver commercials and of course and the music of Vince Guaraldi.
 
For better of worse, as I sat to write this article one Christmas song came to mind: the English carol "The Twelve Days of Christmas." There is just something special - or annoying - about three French hens, two turtle doves, maids-a-milking and drummers drumming that sticks in my mind. And since it's been stuck in my mind, I thought I would share a special version for you. It may be possible to sing about a partridge in a patience tree, or two gratitudes and three less urgencies…  but I will leave that up to your better judgment. Here are my wishes for you:

1st Wish: Patience.   Managers have many, many interactions with people who are not-so-pleasant. It is a fact of our jobs, it is a fact of our lives, and it's the price we pay for being in this wonderful, recession-resistant business. If I could wrap it up in a bow and hand it to you, it would be the gift of patience along with a reminder that the vast majority of those with whom we deal are pleasant people who only want something resolved.  A deep breath, close the eyes, count to 5, ever so slowly. Patience. "Maxima enim, patientia virtus."

2nd Wish: Gratitude.  It is my firm belief that just when everything seems to be falling apart the best thing you can do is be grateful..  If you can't force yourself to be grateful for your current situation, (the ugly Board meeting), be grateful for being employed.  Be grateful for the people you love and the cat that sleeps on your bed. I wish you gratitude because there is no positive purpose in railing against a bad situation. Be grateful, through gritted teeth if you must,  for what you have. This attitude of gratitude only make for good in your life. "Post tenebras spero lucem."

3rd Wish: Less urgency and more importance. "We live in constant tension between the urgent and the important."   Everyone wants something from you, and they want it right now. They email, they text, they call, they track you down. We are crushed by incoming communication that is never off which greatly extends (without warrant) our work day; i.e., your IPhone, IPad or Blackberry.  This bombardment of continual communication creates a sense of urgency, thus giving all incoming communication a false sense of importance. Everything is urgent, yet not everything is important and when you truly grasp this difference can I wish to you the small luxury of not responding instantaneously to the 'urgent' when it takes us away from the truly 'important.' "Veritas vos liberabit."

4th Wish: Great Boards. I wish for you Boards that understand their communities and know they must have a strong foundation of documents and policies. I wish you Boards that  hold productive meetings and value integrity and credibility.  I wish for you Boards that recognize your competence and understand overall manager compensation.  I wish you Boards that release personal agendas, have a sense of humor and never, ever, micromanage.   There is nothing that puts a manager in the groove like a great Board.  "Spiritus intus alit."

5th Wish: Great vendors. Community managers live and die by the performance of their vendors: Those who mow the lawn, paint the units, repair the light fixtures, remove the snow or clean the pools. If they do their jobs well, there are a lot less troubles within the community.  Over the years, the relationships you develop with vendors will produce dividends of which the communities will never know: When a pipe breaks on Friday at 6pm, there is never a question as to if they will show up to make the repair. It is a foregone conclusion that will be handled quickly and professionally. To that end I wish you great vendors to make life easier. I also wish you to remember they make your education more affordable and keep our professional organizations viable. "Semper fidelis."

6th Wish: The ability to see your Butterfly Effect. I wish for community managers to realize they can touch dozens, hundreds or even thousands of people in a single day, affecting each of those people and sometimes quite profoundly.  I know you don't think about it because having that effect is hard to see due to the results of the work performed often comes at a much later time, thus; the thoughtful, intelligent action that brought positive results is muted or forgotten altogether. Or, the act is so subtle it misses recognition completely (all in a day's work!). But make no mistake: Community managers can and do have a profound and lasting effect touching dozens, sometimes hundreds of people in a single day.  What you do matters greatly, please know it. "Fluctuat nec mergitur."

7th Wish: Integrity.  Why do I wish you integrity? Because as the community management business is a diminutive one and each of us is separated by six degrees (more likely two or three); i.e., if I don't know you, I know someone who does. Our professional world is that small. And the only thing you take with you is your integrity.  Thus, I wish you integrity in all that you say and do, and wish that those with whom you interact all have that same integrity.  How much easier your life would be! "… Integrity, in the main, is more than a compass that points true north. It's been said that choices you make, make you. Once you make those choices, it has ownership over you, and then it colors everything you say or do. We need as pristine a channel as possible to execute a clear path of flight. If you make a bad choice, you have to go back and make it right to move forward. Most people don't come back to that point. That's the difference. That's integrity. And it's everything."  "Spectemur agendo."

8th Wish. Laughter.  Most of us don't laugh enough in our lives, and frankly I don't get it. Our business is ripe with ridiculous and absurd situations. I mean really!  It may take you a few days, weeks or months to see the humor in some situations, but if you let it, it will come. Look for them.  Let me give you one recent example that happened to me: On my last speaking gig at IREM Honolulu, I needed a couple of props, and those props had to be lollipops of some sort. Before I head out to the gig, I stop in the store at my hotel looking for said lollipops.  Ah! I spot some hanging near the candy bars, grab 5 of them and go to check out. Unfortunately, I didn't have my reading glasses and to my astonishment, those lollipops were $4 each! I'm thinking gee, things really ARE expensive in Hawaii! So off I go to my engagement, and of course do my shtick with the lollipops, which eventually get tossed out to members of the audience.  Fast forward to a week later as I am sorting through my receipts and I come across one from that trip and for that store. It doesn't say 5 candies, or even lollipops. It says: Condoms.  What I thought were lollipops were rolled up condoms - on a stick.  And I tossed them out to the audience as props.  This is what happens when you don't have your glasses.  Of course now I know why the 22 year old guy working the counter gave me such a funny look when I was checking them out. And I now wonder if IREM will ever invite me back?! Seriously, folks, you can't make this stuff up! So, laugh at those absurd situations, and laugh at yourself. "Risus per lacrimas." (A Latin term meaning Laughter through tears.)

9th Wish: Less Stress. Oh, how I wish each of you less stress in your lives. To that end, realize we can only control our end of any situation and that your number one defense against stress is to be realistic in about how you operate.  Disorganization and procrastination are wholly within our control and can be fixed right now; leading to fewer stressful moments and sleepless nights. Moreover, I wish you the ability to deal with things as they come, be able to do your best and then let go of the result. This wish is for you and about your good: Your mental health and physical health and well-being, because I want you to be healthy and in this business for the long run. "Memento mori."

10th Wish:  Indomitable Spirit.  Getting up, facing each day with a smile, thinking how to make things better, standing by our word, looking for innovation and taking a few risks: I wish you that Indomitable Spirit:  Strong of character, unable to be subdued or overcome, and the will to keep plowing forward, to go to work with an air of confidence and a glint in your eye. The fun in our work is in the challenge, and the real fun is meeting that challenge with our Indomitable Spirit. "Viriliter age."

11th Wish: Macro-management.  Maybe this should be my first Christmas wish for you because it is often the most vexing of your daily challenges: I wish you macro-management. I wish you big thinking Boards who are confident in their own managerial abilities and don't feel the need to mentor you, or tell you how to think, write, organize or manage people.  If each of us had a wand, we would wave it and be rid of that dreaded tendency.  Until that time, managers, look to developing and improving your professional detachment skills. They will go a long in assisting you to cope with certain forms of micromanagement, and will develop confidence and professional ease. "iSine ira et studio."

12th Wish:  A Wonderful Life. Lastly I wish you all a wonderful life: Peace, joy, love. A better work life. Good coffee. Pets that love you. Family and friends. Most of all I wish you clarity: Clarity to see life as it is, to see others as they are, and to see yourself as you are, and to be ok with all of it. But also I wish you the clarity to see what you what you can be in the coming years. It's truly a Wonderful Life.  "Esto perpetua." and "In hoc signo vinces."

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to everyone.
¹ Charles E. Hummel Tyranny of the Urgent
² Rolf Crocker, CMCA AMS CEO, M&C Association Services

Adamen Inc © 2010 All rights reserved.